
I haven’t been feeling very good lately due to the very stressful situation that happened during my time at the seasonal job this summer season. Because of the verbal abuse being thrown my way everyday, I left the job early to return back to Florida and move back in with immediate family.
Since then, I’ve been on a slow road to recovery for my mental and emotional health since both took several huge hits. One of the things I’ve done is jump back into hobbies and interests that spark joy within my soul and please the inner creative soul in me.
Hobbies like film/analog photography. More specifically, developing rolls of film at home.
During my time in Maine, I managed to order the correct film reels and another tank and my C-41 chemicals were still in good shape, so there was no reason for me to not start up again.
I managed to develop 4 film rolls (two 35mm, two 120mm, all four were color film), but I definitely need to work on rolling the film onto the reels correctly and in complete darkness. I have a tendency to get super impatient and that is not giving me the results I want. Especially considering that the majority of my film is 120mm and I’m looking towards creating a photo series on Monhegan Island based on the number of photos I’ve taken of the island’s natural environment.
Needless to say, I want to make sure I’m doing this correctly so my taken photos don’t get ruined. The two rolls of 35mm film turned out okay, but I rolled the first 120mm film too tightly and the next one got exposed to some light leaking into the closet I was in. Some photos were salvaged, but the rest were ruined and that wasn’t nice to see.
Despite the mishaps, I’m feeling better about myself because I’m indulging in something that makes me happy. I’ll get better at rolling and developing, but for now this is making me feel better about myself.
And that’s what counts, right?
You have such talent and a beautiful spirit. I am sorry you suffered such abuse. You are in a better place now, and I think that creativity will help you heal.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I’m taking it slow day by day and it’s helping a lot. Reconnecting with my creative soul is really healing for me right now.
LikeLiked by 1 person