2020 was a rough year for me. Even though I made a personal vow to not end up bitter in my older years ahead and do the things that bring me joy, I still experienced heavy resistance from strangers and even from people I knew. But I still made the choice to “go against the grain,” so to speak, and do what makes me happy.
As this year closes, I look back on my accomplishments and everything that happened to me and I smile. Why? Because in this year, I stepped out of my comfort zone quite a few times and learned so much more about myself than I realized. Some parts of me are very dark and need serious improvement while other qualities deserve praise and nurturing.
But more importantly, I did the things I loved and discovered that those hobbies and interests truly bring me an unbridled, unrestrained feeling of joy that can’t be matched.
Some of the things I’ve done that showcased my wonderful qualities and focused on my interests and hobbies:
– completed 6 – 8 more pencil drawings for my portfolio
– dove headfirst and deeply into my spirituality (meditation, journal writing, completing astrology birth chart, etc.)
– traveled to the state of Maine for a seasonal job over the summer (Monhegan Island; I also consider this my first time taking a solo road trip to somewhere I’ve never been to)
– enforced a boundary towards the immediate family concerning phone calls and texting (something I did to really focus on myself)
– went stargazing 3 – 4 times and saw so many shooting stars and the Milky Way
– started making wax melts and shampoo bars for my pleasure
– started the process of building an online shop and presence for my wax melts and shampoo bars to be sold on (still a work-in-progress)
– cut my damaged hair off and threw away the hair bleach, developer and color remover in favor of having healthy hair
Just traveling alone to somewhere I’ve never been before, following my heart and doing things that make me happy really changed my mindset for the better and I’m slowly accepting everything about myself. Of course, this also came with the harsh reality that not everyone will like me and some will do their hardest to undermine me under the pretense that I’m considered frail and meek. That pill was very difficult to swallow, but it’s a harsh truth that I had to accept.
And, to be frank, I’m really angry and upset at seeing the true colors of our society. This pandemic has brought forth to light on how empathy is largely non-existent and how the majority of people are very cruel and refuse to comfort others in their toughest times. I’ve been on the receiving end of this kind of treatment and it’s really breaking my spirit and faith in humanity as a whole.
Despite that, I still believe that I accomplished more in this year than in 2020 and I came out with a crystal clear image of what I want my life to look and feel like. As mentioned before, I stepped out of the norm, took a chance and came out on the other side with a different perspective on my goals, future and my way of living in our society.
As always, I will continue to write down all of my accomplishments on paper for me to see and marvel at. Hopefully 2021 was a good year for you and whatever you did, I hope you look back on those things and marvel at how much you did outside of the norm.
Here’s to starting 2022 off right!